2015-12-23 19.58.30

Gratitude

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For most, birth and death bring along a truckload of emotions that are amplified to an extreme. Gratitude is the emotion I have been feeling as of late. Gratitude for friends and family both long lost and extremely close. Gratitude for caring and empathetic colleagues. Gratitude for a community that has rallied around my family. Gratitude for my beautiful boys and baby girl. Gratitude for spending 20 wonderful years with my late wife. The past 45 days have been some of the most remarkable in my entire life. I’ve seen the depths of sorrow and the heights of joy. Trying to make sense of it is something I will be doing for years to come.

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Through all of it however, I seem to find my way back to gratitude. So MANY people have helped by giving donations, making meals, watching the kids, ensuring the family had a great xmas, removing snow, fixing things around the house, sharing good scotch, helping me with paperwork, offering supportive words/advice, and simply being present while I grieve. These amazing people come from far and wide — people I know and many I do not.

I have no way to thank every person that has helped my family (and believe me, I am trying) but know this: I am wholeheartedly grateful for the support you have given me. My promise to you is that I fully intend to pay it forward to others when their time of need arises.

Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.

Much love. Matt.

Life, Death, and Focus

Like many, I read the New York Times article by Oliver Sacks. It is a touching and honest piece about his impending last days on this earth. I cannot help but feel his words are a gift to all as a reminder that we should cherish each and every day.

I feel a sudden clear focus and perspective. There is no time for anything inessential. I must focus on myself, my work and my friends. I shall no longer look at “NewsHour” every night. I shall no longer pay any attention to politics or arguments about global warming.

As I reach the midpoint in my life, I find myself wondering if I am truly focusing on the correct things. Life moves fast when you have a spouse and 2.4 kids. Perhaps it’s time to start paying more attention and stop sleepwalking.

The end of the essay says it all:

Above all, I have been a sentient being, a thinking animal, on this beautiful planet, and that in itself has been an enormous privilege and adventure.

Godspeed Mr. Sacks.